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Saturday, 19 March 2011

I find it irksome...

Men who wear jumpers (or sweaters) around their shoulders

What is this chap trying to say by sporting this ensemble?

"I've got enough money to buy this, even though I don't really need it."

"That bird will think I'm the dog's knackers in this. I'm gonna have sex coming out of my ears before the night's over."

"I hope the weather doesn't turn inclement, otherwise I'll be forced to wear this like a normal person."


"I'm a twat, and I don't know it."

The instructions for putting on such a garment are actually quite simple. Squeeze your head through the big hole at the top (not the even bigger one at the bottom as that'll only make you look silly) whilst simultaneously thrusting your arms through the two long dangly things (don't want to sound pedantic, but they're called sleeves) at either side. When not in use, the garment should be hung up, stored in a drawer, put in a laundry basket, or discarded on the floor.

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