What does a lazy bastard do on his day off?

Are you one of those blokes who works hard but doesn't know what to do with his free time? Here are some tips to help you fill that dead time:

Exercise

There is no excuse for neglecting your regime just because you're on holiday. I spent at least an extra minute scratching my arsehole before getting out of bed this morning. On top of this, I have made several arduous trips to the bog and the kitchen.

Drunch/ Breakohol (don't know which sounds better)

Whatever you want to call it, it is the most important meal of the day. Get something edible and melt cheese over it. Then, prepare a nutritious bevy to go with it. Luckily, this morning, the missus made a smoothie type thing which is going down well with the bottle of rum I brought home last night.

Music

This is very much dependant on drucnh (or breakohol). I've chosen a mixture of Kate Bush and Rush this morning (muchas gracias, Youtube).

Kate's thighs are still as I remembered all those years ago in the Babooshka video... Kate, you're a fucking legend:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ot3cVY1JESQ

Check out the Waterboys as well. Love this when I'm on a morning lash:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ug7bVBxtAbM

Fucking love a bit of decent music in the morning, me.

The telly

Fuck all on, as usual, so I watched some of season 5 of Family Guy on dvd (Church of Fonzy is a classic). Got bored with that, so I'm going to watch my favourite episode of Peep Show.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ug7bVBxtAbM

Bollocks, almost out of rum..........